


Balance of Pain

by khorybannefin



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Dom!Sam, Dom/sub, F/M, Rough Sex, Roughness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:26:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24911566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khorybannefin/pseuds/khorybannefin
Summary: After the reader gets an injury that almost kills her on a hunt Sam decides to claim her as his, finally.
Relationships: Sam Winchester/Reader, Sam Winchester/You
Comments: 2
Kudos: 47





	Balance of Pain

Balance of Pain

Pairing: Reader + Sam 

Reader Gender: Female

Writer Gender: Female

Author: khorybannefin

Word Count: 4772

Warnings: Blood, rough/angry sex, profanity, blasphemy, unprotected sex, dom Sam, violence

God I hurt. I’ve never hurt this bad in my life, but I can’t let him see.

***Earlier***

“So according to this it’s a Loup Garou.”

“A loopy what?” Dean looked confused and irritated. In fact he usually did. Research was by far his least favorite part of a job. Sam, however, looked up from his own stack of reference books with a different type of confusion.

“Wait,” he said. “I’ve heard that before. Isn’t that just a fancy name for a werewolf?”

“Technically yes, but no.” I open my mouth to continue explaining but Dean interrupted, as was his wont, with another aggravated question.

“If it’s a damned werewolf why wouldn’t they just call it that?”

I sighed and rolled my eyes, sending a frustrated glare at the elder Winchester. We hadn’t been on a job in almost a week, and while I was enjoying the down time it appeared that Dean was feeling a little cabin fever. Well fuck him. Just because he wanted to kill things didn’t mean I’d pray for a bunch of people to die just so he could scratch that itch. Honestly, since he got back from purgatory he was so full of blood lust that it was scary. Dean had always been rough, but never vicious. I tried to shake that thought off and get back to the point.

“A Loup Garou is a werewolf, but it isn’t the contagious kind. Most werewolves result from what is basically an infection passed through fluid contact. One bites someone and they get the disease, doomed to end up the same thing as their creator.

The Loup Garou are actually a cursed bloodline. The change isn’t an infection, it’s an inherited family curse. Everyone with a drop of that families blood in their veins will turn at a particular point in their development.”

“Let me guess,” Sam said. “Puberty?”

“You’d think so,” I replied, “but it’s actually much more specific. According to this it’s when they reach “sexual maturity”.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Dean was still confused. I was really trying to be circumspect, but there was really no way of sugar coating this.

“Their first time, Dean. Virgins don’t change.”

Both boys kind of started at that. Being male that cut a little close to home. Guys tended to lose theirs quicker than girls, statistically. I could see the memories running through their heads. How old had they been their first time? Now imagine if they turned at that age. Realization dawned almost simultaneously.

“Shit,” Dean said softly.

“The worst part is the change is instant. You orgasm and your afterglow includes claws and blood.”

Both boys winced at that. I felt the same way. I mean, seriously, your first time usually sucks, but you don’t turn into a monster and eat your date. And there had been three deaths so far. The first was a sixteen year old girl who’d been found eviscerated and partially eaten in the back of a van out on a back road. The owner of the van, also a teenager, hadn’t been seen since. There’d been two more murders of the same type. One was a jock at the local high school that the kid had had problems with recently. The other was a hobo down in the park. Still not sure why that hadn’t garnered a bit more attention. I mean, how can you get eat a guy and no one notices in a public park? The town, however, was small and the murders had sort of created their own curfew.

“Well, it looks like this kid has had a series of bad nights. Any family?”

Sam looked up from his laptop and answered Dean’s question.

“Parents. They seem normal, haven’t heard from him according to reports.”

“Yeah,” I replied. “I’ll bet you dinner that one of them belongs to that bloodline and decided not to tell their family, hoping it would go away.”

“Let’s go find out.”

*** Later***

Turns out it was the father, but it was odd. See, his marriage was a cover. Small town, you just couldn’t be gay out in the open. He and his wife were best friends, but both of them were gay. She had decided she wanted a kid. Got inseminated by her husband. He knew about the family curse, but he thought it wouldn’t pass if he wasn’t “active”. He’d never had sex. Talk about a forty year old virgin! When people started dying and his son disappeared he knew what had happened. He’d been out searching, to tell the boy what was going on, but hadn’t been able to find him and the kid hadn’t come back to the house. While we dug all this out of dad another body showed up. We finally tracked the kid to an abandoned house on the outskirts of town. That’s where it all went pear shaped.

“Seriously Cas? You need him right now? We’re in the middle of something!”

I’m not tall, but thankfully neither is the angel. Dean was packing up, ready to take his toys and leave. I caught Sam hiding a grin as I went toe to toe with a celestial being. I got right up in his face. What? I’m nothing if not tenacious.

“You can’t just show up here, in the middle of a case, and knock our team down by a third on a whim! There are bodies on the ground here Cas, and a teenage boy who has no idea what’s happening to him.”

“I am certain you and Sam can deal with the beast. This is more important.”

His tone was so infuriating! I drew in a breath and was seriously going to let him have it when Dean jumped in. I wish I knew why he spent so much time defending a freaking angel. Not like Castiel couldn’t take care of himself. Makes you wonder about their relationship, but I digress.

“Come on Y/N. You know you and Sam have got this. If Cas says he needs my help then I’m going. He’s saved our bacon too many times.”

Dean hoisted his bag on his shoulder and was gone in a flutter of wings before I could say anything else.

“Agh! Damn it all to hell and back!”

Sam was chuckling and trying to hide it. Damn him and his dimples too. Cutest pain in my ass I’d ever met. He closed up his laptop and started gathering his things in the motel room we’d been sharing. At least with Dean gone I got my own bed. Not that I minded sharing, but it could be frustrating. A girl needs her private time too.

That and it felt unbelievably strange to be sleeping awkwardly back to back with someone you felt close to. I wonder if Sam would miss it. He never said anything. He was typically more of a gentleman than Dean, at least outwardly. He always looked uncomfortable with the sleeping arrangement, but he never mentioned anything. Probably afraid he’d embarrass me, though if he wanted to do that he’d have to try harder.

We piled into the car and headed out.

Looking back I wish I’d done more research, asked more questions. It might have saved me.

*** ***

God I hurt. I’d never hurt this bad in my whole life. I could feel the blood bubbling in one lung, and knew the other had collapsed. I was panting, trying to hold still. The chunk missing out of my shoulder was bad enough, but the claws that had popped through my torso were what would kill me. It wasn’t even claw marks. They were punctures, five of them, going four inches deep. They’d hit more than lungs, I knew.

The kid was too far gone. Maybe if he’d been prepared he could have controlled it, but by the time we found him he was mindless, just a killing machine. But he was bigger than I’d thought and twice as fast. He didn’t appear and disappear like the angels could, but he was fast enough it seemed like it. He’d caught me in a hallway after Sam and I had split up.

I was on an upper floor. The thing moved so fast I didn’t hear or see it until it was on me. Claws jabbed into me, bearing me to the floor. I could smell rot on the things breath as it struck, worrying at my shoulder. Between the claws and the broken collar bone I was screaming despite myself. The pain was blinding.

Sam came pounding up the stairs. It lifted its head, growling to protect its kill. Sam had to shoot it three times to get it off me, and finished the clip while it writhed on the ground. It took much longer to die than I thought it would. And unlike a regular werewolf it didn’t turn back into the teenager once it stopped breathing. We’d have to find a way to bury that huge pile of fur. I couldn’t bring myself to care.

I was losing blood fast, and I knew it. Sam came back to me, lifting me up. I stifled a scream and he saw it. I drew my denim jacket closed over my front with my good arm before he could see my chest. It wouldn’t do any good. I’d be dead long before he could get me anywhere. I didn’t want him to suffer that guilt when I knew he couldn’t do anything about it. He was examining the bite on my shoulder.

“We’ve got to stop the bleeding. Looks like he took a piece. Going to need stitches. Can you move your arm?”

I shook my head and cursed mentally for moving. I was too dizzy to move my head that much.

“Collar bone is broken. That arm won’t work.”

“Well, come on. Here,” he passed me a wad of cloth to press to the shoulder wound. “Let’s get you back to the motel and I’ll stitch you up.”

When he tried to pick me up I screamed. I was dead weight in his arms. I didn’t have the strength to help him carry me. He wasn’t expecting it and settled me down to the floor. My jacket had fallen open and he noticed the almost black pool of blood I’d been sitting in. He laid me down and ripped the shirt I was wearing wide open.

“Jesus Christ!”

He was moving me, gently, turning me too look at the wounds. I couldn’t even fight him. Laying there I felt like I was drowning. I coughed and felt the blood come up. Just a few more minutes and it would be over. Sam was cursing and trying to stop the bleeding, but he could see how bad it was. I’ve never seen Sam cry like that, his face twisted like he was the one dying on the floor.

“God Damn it Y/N! I can’t…” Sam held his hands out helplessly, kneeling in the puddle that my life was leaving in its wake as it ebbed away.

My eyes were starting to dim. I’d always thought that was a movie conceit, but it wasn’t. I couldn’t stand that look on Sam’s face. There were a whole lot of faces I wanted to see on Sam, especially directed at me, but this was not one of them.

“It’s ok, Sammy…”

I reached out and touched his hand, trying to smile. I could feel everything shutting down. It was actually a relief. In my fading hearing I thought I heard Sam scream, but I couldn’t hear what.

Seconds later fire ripped through me. It stole my breath, and I realized I had breath. I sat bolt upright, seeing a fading golden glow. I young man stood in front of me, one I hadn’t seen. I was still burning, but it was fading, and I realized I didn’t hurt anymore other than the vestiges of that heat. I was moving, tentatively, as Sam talked to the man.

“Thank you, Samandriel.”

“Castiel sent me to help. I am not as powerful as he. She will bear scars, but she will live.”

Sam thanked him and he disappeared. I didn’t even have to guess he was an angel at that point. I reached up to the bite and it was there, a knot of baby tender scar tissue. I looked down at my open shirt, turning to one side. I had spots, like pock marks about the size of a dime each, in a line down my torso on both sides. When I looked up I could see that Sam was furious, but he didn’t say a word. He just picked me up and put me in the car.

We drove back to the motel in silence. I kept glancing over at him. His jaw was clenched so tight I could see the muscles rolling over the bone. His hands were white knuckled on the steering wheel. I didn’t even try to say anything. I’ll be honest, I felt ashamed, about the whole thing. He had a right to be pissed. He slammed the car door when we got there, and started digging in the trunk. I ducked my head and went in the room we shared, heading for the shower.

I walked out of the bathroom twenty minutes later wearing my normal bed clothes, a long t-shirt and boy shorts. Sam was standing in the middle of the room, barefoot and wearing loose athletic pants. It looked like he’d cleaned off most of the blood in the little kitchenette and changed. He stood with his back to me. I could see his hands bunched into fists at his side, and couldn’t help but notice how that tension moved up into the muscles of his shoulders and back. Sam did not spend a lot of time shirtless, and I’ve got to say I have no idea why. He’s stunning. Taller than Dean and built much heavier. He might be the younger of the Winchesters but he was by no means the “little” brother.

“Sam, I’m sorry…” I stepped up and touched the tense muscles in his shoulder. I was not prepared when he whirled around and grabbed me by my upper arms hard enough to bruise. I couldn’t help it, I gasped. And I admit that it was only half pain and being startled, and at least half of something else that blushed me down to my neck.

“What the fuck were you doing?!” Sam yelled, shaking me hard. “You were just going to die right there? Just not tell me? What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking of you!”

I struggled in his grip but he only tightened his hold, keeping me where I was in front of him. He was so furious that heat was coming off of him in palpable waves. He was always a furnace, but this was worse. He was blazing, and it wasn’t just his skin. His eyes were hot too, locked on mine, angry and accusing.

“I was too far gone! You couldn’t have saved me, and you’d have wasted time trying.”

“You can’t make that decision for me!” He shook me again, harder, and I made a noise. It was not a bad noise. He noticed, and his voice got very quiet.

“Do you have any idea what it would do to me if you died?”

I’m glad I couldn’t see myself because I felt my mouth open and close at least three times like a damn fish. I couldn’t think of anything to say. I didn’t even know what he meant. All I knew was something had changed, and his closeness was suddenly a lot more threatening than it had been. I pulled my eyes away from him. Desperately I looked around the room for something, anything, to break the tension rising in the room. He shook me again, dragging my attention and my eyes back to him. The fire in his gaze was different. Oh he was still angry, but something else was with it. When he moved my feet actually left the floor.

My back hit the wall before I knew his intention and his mouth on mine was a brutal thing. The fire I’d felt from him was in his mouth too, his kisses demanding and punishing. He left me no room to breathe, no way to return what he was doing to me. He just took, with bruising force, ripping the noises out of my mouth before they could hit air. His hands, so much larger than my arms, pinned me to the wall with my toes dangling. I was not nearly tall enough for Sam and he held me where he could reach me. He wasn’t relying entirely on his hands either. His body was a hard mass against me. I couldn’t bring my hands up to touch skin, and god how I wanted to. His chest was crushed to mine, his muscled thigh between my legs. I could feel the hardness of an erection pinned against one hip and I opened my eyes in shock. It wasn’t the only, the first, or even the last shock he had in store for me.

Sam had taken note of the sounds his aggressive kissing were drawing out of me. If he didn’t know I liked rough he sure as hell did now. He ripped his mouth away from mine and watched my face as he rolled the tight muscle of his thigh over the junction between my legs. I couldn’t help the moan, just couldn’t. My head tilted back and I moved my hips back against him. He let go of one arm and grabbed a fistful of my hair, yanking my head roughly to one side. He licked a line down my throat and found that tender scar. He kissed and licked over the sensitive new skin there. I was biting my lower lip, trying to stop the little whimpers of pleasure. When I felt teeth I cried out. I knew his less-than-gentle ministrations had very easily marked that skin, his bite layered over the other. His lips grazed back up and his voice growled hot in my ear.

“Mine.”

If I wasn’t aroused before that did it. Heat rushed down my body, pooling at the spot of friction between my thighs. I took a moment to pity my poor underwear. It hadn’t done anything to deserve that deluge, but I couldn’t correct it now. I could honestly say I didn’t want to. I opened my mouth to respond to what he’d said and found my mouth full. It was war between us now. He demanded and took what he wanted, but now I fought back, wanting my own piece of him. His hand was still in my hair, hurting but just enough and in the right way to keep that heavy lust flowing. My free hand got to touch him, and I couldn’t believe how he felt. Soft skin sheathing hard muscle that rippled under my fingers. I slid my hand up to his face and lanced my nails down his throat. He pulled back roughly, letting my arms go. Before I could react he’d grabbed handfuls of my shirt and flimsy cotton tore as he shredded it off me by sheer force.

God damn that was hot!

The shirt fell off of me in pieces, leaving my breasts exposed and the boy shorts the only thing between me and him. I looked down and could see the tight muscles in his abdomen leading down. The muscles around his hips drew my gaze further down as they disappeared into the loose pants he was wearing. Not loose enough, as evidence of his arousal couldn’t be missed. There was a wet spot on one side, clearly of his own making, and another on the opposite leg that was obviously from me. Sorry, not even sorry.

Again he grabbed me and I landed with a bounce, on my back, on the nearest bed. I raised my head and watched him crawl up my body, the predatory hunger in his eyes making my stomach flutter. Then his weight was on me, and the kisses moved to my breasts. He pinched, hard. Twisted, pulled, sucked, licked, and squeezed my breasts so hard there would be finger shaped bruises on them later. I was squirming under him, so hot. As his hands and mouth started roving every bit of exposed skin I had he started to talk.

“Do you have any idea how much I’ve wanted you? The torture it’s been, sharing a bed with you? You get under the covers wearing this and I have to try to sleep with the worlds biggest hard on. Everything you do makes me want you, makes me love you a little bit more. And you were ready to die tonight without ever knowing, without giving us this chance?”

He dug his fingertips into the scars now on my sides. I cried out, my back leaving the bed as I tried to hold onto him. He grabbed my wrists and pinned them above my head, his grip tight enough that I could feel the bones rubbing together. His other hand he slid down, between my legs, and stroked me through the panties. I whimpered, started to beg. He squeezed my wrists harder.

“Shut up,” he commanded. “You don’t get to get out of this. You don’t get to leave me. Every woman I have ever loved have left me a little more broken. I won’t do it again. So you listen.”

He kissed me until I tasted blood, then growled in my ear.

“You. Are. MINE.”

On the last word his hands fisted in my panties and my hips left the bed as the flimsy barrier joined the remains of my shirt on the floor. He gave me no warning. He didn’t take it slow. Two fingers slid into me all the way in a swift stroke. I moaned, feeling the ache of being stretched that fast, but god the contact! I hadn’t been touched in so long. Sam moved his hand, fingers driving me crazy, the heel of his palm working pressure on my clit. I was moaning nearly rhythmically now, working my hips against him. I could still feel that hardness against my side, and I could feel him rubbing against me almost unconsciously.

Sam, my soft quiet Sam, had grown so vicious in the last hour! And I wanted more. I wanted him to make good on that claim, to make me his. I would take whatever he gave me, all of it, just to keep doing this and feeling this with him. The orgasm snuck up on me. I came, head thrashing, fighting against his hands holding me down. He was merciless, not letting up until I was spasming and panting under him.

“That was good, but not enough.”

Again I opened my mouth to respond but couldn’t get the words out before he thrust his wet fingers in my mouth, effectively gagging me with my own orgasm. He released my wrists and shucked out of his pants. There hadn’t been anything underneath. I raised my head to look at all of him, and I could have moaned just at that. He was glorious, every inch of his body designed to make a woman absolutely wanton.

He leaned down and wrapped his arms around me, lifting me up. He brought me to his chest and I had to straddle him to do it. He was kneeling on the bed, knees apart, and the length of him waiting. His hands on my ass opened me up and he lowered me, impaling me on the hard length, slowly. My head went back and I groaned at the ceiling. He joined me as he buried himself in me, until my ass was pressed tight against his hips.

“Christ!” he whispered. “It’s like no one has ever had you! So tight…”

He lifted me off him and then all the way back down. It was just as good, and my hips begged for more, rotating in small circles with him inside. He dug his fingers into the soft flesh of my ass.

“Stop that. You’re mine and I will cum when I damned well please.”

I shivered at his tone of voice. Sam was never this dominating. Not ever. It was so easy to overlook the sensitive man, the one who constantly looked like the world hurt his soul and he couldn’t take seeing others in pain. But here he was, destroying me by inches, and loving it as much as I was. I nodded at his words, not trusting myself now to speak as he moved in me, maddeningly slow.

He lifted and lowered me onto his cock, muscles bunching as I held on for dear life. I was making noises, I knew, but I couldn’t really hear myself. The pleasure was unbearable at this slow pace. I ached so badly for more. I couldn’t help it, I begged for it.

“Please, Sam, I need you! I can’t…it’s too much…not enough!”

He actually chuckled at that, buried his teeth in my breast and brought me down on him hard as I screamed. He slid his hands up to my hips, moving to encourage me, and I wasted no time. My hips worked in waves as he leaned back, looking up at me as I rode him. I could feel my nails digging into his chest as I rubbed my clit up and back with every stroke of him inside me. I started to tremble.

“Oh god…god Sam…” The words were full of pleasure and need. I looked down at him and he smiled, feral possessiveness in his eyes. He grabbed me and threw me back onto the bed, landing on top of me and thrusting violently.

“Sam! Sam! So good…god I’m…”

“Say it, Y/N. Tell me who you belong to. I want to hear it when you cum.”

“I…belong…to…oh, god, fuck…SAM!”

I gave him what he wanted, screaming his name for the world to hear as I came apart under him, bucking and writhing. He waited until I was almost done before he came. Cursing and moaning into my neck as he forced himself as deep as he could go. He was jerking, convulsing against me and I could feel the pulse of him, hot and so hard, as he let go all of the pent up pleasure we had built between us.

He collapsed down onto his elbows, face in my neck, as we both tried to catch our breath. Eventually he raised his head, looking at me with more tenderness than I’d ever seen in him. He brushed my hair back, fingers light as he touched my face, almost like he didn’t believe I was real.

“You can’t leave me. Not ever.”

The plea in his voice could have broken a thousand hearts. How could I fight that? Even if I hadn’t wanted this very thing for longer than I cared to admit I couldn’t have walked away from that look, that voice, and those words.

“I didn’t want to leave you before. But I’m afraid you’ve adopted me. You won’t get rid of me anytime soon.”

He rolled onto his side, pulling me with him. We curled up together, legs still tangled. Eye to eye we smiled softly at each other, stupid in love and still too ridiculous to admit it out loud, even now.

*** ***

The job Cas had him on wasn’t that big a deal after all. If he didn’t know better he could have sworn that the stuck up angel missed him. Still, the angel popped him back into the motel room after less than a day. They both stopped and looked at the room. There were shreds of clothes all over the room. The bed was askew, a lamp was destroyed, and there was actually a body sized dent in the plaster next to the bathroom door. The whole place smelled like blood and sex. And to top it off his brother and Y/N were curled together, both utterly naked, holding onto each other like lost children, holding hands even in their sleep. Dean stood there, shocked and vaguely impressed. Castiel leaned towards him.

“Is this something to do with the Pizza Man?”

Deans groan didn’t even wake them.


End file.
